So my husband told me I am a hypocrite. I was astounded at first. How dare he. But he was right, I AM a hypocrite. He told me when we were talking about the insanity that is my house. I can talk til I am blue in the face. I can yell til I don't like the sound of my own voice, but I can't seem to get them to keep the house picked up. It's a constant, pick up your clothes or put away your (insert object that has been sitting out since I told them the same thing the day before.) But as I look around I realize I still haven't put away my clothes, my bedroom is a mess and I can never find my phone, keys, purse or coat. I am the leader of the pack. I can't expect them to do something I am not willing to do myself. Here is where I whine. I don't wanna clean up. I hate house work. It is overwhelming and annoying and I have to much junk... whine, whine, whine, bitch, moan, complain. It's funny because I clean for a living. But there is a difference, it is other people stuff. I don't have to worry about throwing things away. I dust, I vacuum, I wipe things down and I mop. I don't look at it and say where is this supposed to go. What is the sentimental value of this. Blah Blah.
Now being a hypocrite doesn't end there. I am a food hypocrite and a work out hypocrite. I have no problem looking at someone and thinking "Damn! They could miss a meal or ten." Then I go and I look in a mirror and think "Damn! I could miss a meal or two." or my favorite, "It's water weight!" How much water do I think I am holding, a pool? I tell my kids one pop a day its not good for you and I am on my third. Or I tell them that's enough and then go back and get something else for myself. I am a midnight eater, a drama snacker and a boredom muncher. So how can I look at my daughter and tell her not to do the same. I have been known to look at a particular couple at the gym and say wow they haven't changed a bit. Well truth be known, either have I! I am still the same fatty that walked in there a year ago. I have lost and found the same weight. I have however lost a few inches. But I am still a hypocrite.
I talk bad about myself in front of the kids. I'm fat, I'm ugly, I hate my hair. I am so negative about myself. So what are they taking from all this? I think it is an interesting question and I am going to pay attention and see what answers I come up with. But I am also going to try every day to not be such a hypocrite. I am going to try to correct myself when I am negative and think about what I am teaching the kids. I am no better than my kids. I am not above them. The best way to teach them is by example. So here goes.
Here is a little prayer to get us on our way. I hope every one has a blessed week.
Dear God, Thank You for today. I am sincerely grateful for the time I get to have with my family. I am blessed to be Your child. Thank You Father for loving me and guiding me. I am profoundly grateful for the time that You have given us to celebrate our traditions. I ask that You continue to bless us and watch over us. Please be with my Grandma Kelly and my Uncle Marlin as they continue their health battles. In Your name we pray. Amen
No comments:
Post a Comment