Now before anyone gets to excited, I am not in Mexico. Though I wish I was. No, my walking family and I have finally crossed the border. We have made it into Mexico. We are 34 miles from the border in Portes Gil. I'm so excited it's silly. I've never been to Mexico and I doubt I'll ever go. Dave has no interest in going and this isn't something I think I would do alone. So I will live it through my walking. We made great miles this week. Becky finally turned in a months worth of miles so that helped to put us over the edge. Great job to all!
I know who wont be contributing for a while. That would be Austin. See, my son broke his foot. He hurt it at school and then he got it caught in the dog cage at home and fell. Looking back I feel bad. He was lying on the floor in pain and I did nothing. In truth I was irritated at him. I had been telling him for weeks to clean his room that it was a death trap, that someone was going to get hurt in there. He just happened to be the one who got hurt. I didn't even think he really got hurt. He has been on an emotional roller coaster lately. He falls he cries, its the worst pain ever, he plays, hes fine. The next day he was hobbling but he seemed alright, a bit sore. Wednesday night when we got back from my moms I wrapped it and looked at it and it was bruised and I said I think it is broken. Dave got shitty with me and told me well then someone should have taken him to the ER then shouldn't they. So that's what I did.
Several hours, a game of alphabet toss and a 1 a.m. happy meal, later we get home and the foot is indeed broken. I get Austin to sleep and Dave to bed and ask him why he snapped at me. He said he told me Monday that he thought it was broke but I had given him a look like he was stupid. I told him I didn't remember the conversation. He said of course I didn't. It's fall. He said it's hard to live with me in the fall. With those words I just laid my head back on the pillow and said nothing. He's right. It is hard to live with me in the fall. It's hard to be me in the fall. I could have countered with, it was the spaghetti day. I was crazed off carbs and sugar and red sauce. Its not my fault, blame the garlic bread or french bread or even the chocolate milk. But the truth of the matter is I knew it was me. I had chosen to ignore my sons pain long before the Carbohydrate Coma. I know the signs of S.A.D. I know what I can do to make it less drastic. But I was already looking down the rabbit hole.
So now I want to pull my hair out. But I guess it is my cross to bear. Austins room is spotless! I spent 5 hours cleaning it. We all help him out doing things because he is "gimpy". I drive him to and pick him up from school, so he doesn't have to ride the special bus. Because he can't be active his PERSONALITY is in overdrive. I love my son. But he is the most annoying 11 year old boy on the face of the planet right now.
On another note. I saw a pic of me when I was skinny. Probably about 10 years ago. I had a neck. OMG I had a long beautiful neck. My whole neck, shoulder, chin, boob flow thing was amazing. I felt like I was looking at a swan. I want that neck back! I want those boobs back! And And And I only had ONE chin!!! So I got myself back on track with MyFitnessPal and I am going to close down the kitchen at 9. I know some people are like 9 is pretty late. But there are some nights we don't even get home to start cooking dinner until 6 or 7. So when all s said and done dishes and everything can be done and put away by 9 and then lights out and kitchen closed at 9.
Well I think it is time for bed. I am tired. So I would like to say a short prayer and head off.
Dear God, Thank You for today. Thank You for the wonderful friends and family who surround me everyday. Please help me to be patient with my son. I know that he isn't happy to be hurt and that he must be bored and irritated and that is why he is driving us all insane. Please help me to be a good parent. Help me to be a good role model here at home and with the boys in the scout pack. Please watch over my sister Micci while she adjusts to her PVC. Please be with my friend Jenny. She has a lot on her plate, God, and it's wearing her and her family down. In your name we pray. Amen
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